Why not? Don’t you trust me?

Last week a delegate on my course asked me a good question relating to the issue of trust.

She said,“Can I ask you a question related to trust?

I don’t know how to handle the situation when my daughter, or anyone else, uses the concept of trust to ask for an unearned concession.

For example, last week my 13 year old daughter said to me “Can I stay over at my boyfriend’s house tonight?”

I said “No. I am not comfortable with that.”

She said “Why not? Don’t you trust me?”

I realised that I had boxed myself in. I could not say “No, I don’t trust you.”
But if I said “Yes I do trust you” that answer would lead to giving a concession that I did not want to give.

Can you help me with this issue: when people ask me “Why not? Don’t you trust me?”

If you want to know please read on..................


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